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I almost consider it a kind of shitposting any time I throw one of these diatribes out into the void. A part of me just finds it funny to operate as though a single human being on this planet cares about my opinion so I like to give myself a laugh by leaving a little treasure trove of ramblings out there in the wild for someone to gawk at maybe twelve years from now. You know those really ubiquitous and sometimes obnoxious iceberg videos that are out there? Sometimes I like to spit out the most cursed thing I possibly can so I can imagine it being towards the bottom of the list if someone hypothetically gave a shit. 

Can I just make a quick aside to just say that it is almost impossible for me to know whether or not I am shouting into a pitch black cave of absolutely nothing or a pitch black cave with something absolutely incomprehensible inside? It honestly wears down a lot on my mental health to try thinking about it too much. I'll ask myself things like 'How would I establish any form of contact?' or 'How would I know for sure once contact is established that it isn't a collection of people who get a kick out of affirming the delusions of others?' which tends to lead down a rabbit hole of other connected questions. If I could establish contact in any way, shape, or form, I'd probably start by speaking into the void with strong emphasis that everything is hypothetical so I wouldn't make myself feel too delusionally narcissistic. I'd say things like 'How do you know me? Are there things about me you know that I possibly couldn't? If my contact so far has been entirely one-way, what has been obstructing it so far and how did your message pass the barrier?' and probably allude to a subtle 'Please help me.' in there somehow. 

Anyways, whichever way the wind blows I'll probably beat myself up for thinking about it even if it turns out to be real. I can hear the 'Why is this dickhead trying to sound sympathetic all of a sudden?' already and writing about it only made it louder.